Letter #37 - Start a bullet journal with me

To anyone who has ever wished to be more organised,

I got sucked into the amazing feat that is a bullet journal. I've been interested in the idea of the journal after seeing it pop up on my Pinterest and Instagram feeds over the last year but I love notebooks too much to stick to just one. However, I think everyone should at least try this method. I wanted to start it with the new year, in hopes of beginning the year, with my best foot forward, but I also wanted to make sure that this wasn't a fad that I would get bored of after a few weeks.

So, I actually started this process at the beginning of December to see how it would be and if it would be something that I stuck to. Let me go back a few steps and explain how I am with planners. Simply put, I forget about them. Even back in school, when you would have a homework planner, I would either not write anything in it, or just forget to ever check it. This makes it sound like I was an awful student, I'm sure, but generally, if something is timetabled in for me, I will remember it. I mean, I survived school, sixth form and university, using just my memory for deadlines. But I have always wanted to be one of those cool, put together people, who can just flip open their diaries and their entire lives are planned out perfectly. They know where they need to be and what they have to do and life is a breeze.

Now, I have no fantasies or expectations of being one of those people. I like the chaos of being 'disorganised'. For me, I can find what I need in the mess, and it works for me. I do, however, want to tap into my potential for productivity. I can be super focused and on task as long as I know that that task has been planned for.

I have so many projects in the pipelines for this next year and I wanted to make sure that they didn't just remain in the pipelines, forgotten and rotting, because I didn't write it all down and the passion wilted away.

I'm not at all an expert on organisation and what I know about bullet journals is information that I have googled and read about from various blogs and YouTube tutorials to get to this point. I also don't use it the way it was probably intended. So as a disclaimer, this is simply my take on a bullet journal and you should check out bulletjournal.com for the original creator's thoughts on these journals.

Anyway, back to my attempt. I read up a lot and fell down the rabbit hole that is Pinterest for hours before I got cracking and actually got anything written down. 

Firstly, get a notebook. I always need lined paper in order to write anything that isn't floating off the page but for more freedom with the pages, I wanted a dotted notebook for easier customisation. I know that the Leichtturn 1917 is a very popular choice of journal and I will admit that I was tempted to get one but for as sleek as it looks, I didn't really want this to be a task of great expense, especially if I wasn't sure I'd stick with it. I shopped around and found a perfect dotted spiral-bound notebook in Muji for a much more reasonable price of £4 and the pages are thick enough that I can write on both sides, even with markers and it doesn't bleed. Spiral bound was important to me because as a leftie, I write at an angle and it's much easier to fold back the pages of a spiral notebook than a traditionally bound one, with stiffer edges. Another great thing about spiral bound is that if I really mess up a page and it bothers me, I can tear it out neatly and that's that. For now, it suits my needs and when it doesn't anymore, I'll change it up.

Next thing to note is that online there are so many beautiful examples of bullet journals that make my soul happy but that I could never recreate. And nor should I. I'm not an artist and my creativity stems from words, not illustrations so if you feel like your journal doesn't live up to others examples, just remember that it's yours to customise as you wish and that can mean keeping it minimal and neat if that's what you'd prefer. I keep a few coloured pens with me all the time so that I can just switch colours if I get a bit bored and that's enough for me.

Now, for the actual layout of this thing. I have to say that I wasn't very strict with myself because I wasn't sure what I would need at the beginning. What I did learn is that less is more. If you start with it as a simple planner and then add collections or extra pages for specific notes as you go, that might work best for you. 

For me, I left a page for the index but I didn't feel that I needed a key like most bullet journals contain, simply because I would know what I was writing and what it meant. 

I started with a monthly calendar, just because I liked seeing what day corresponded with each date. I also added some goals for the month that I thought were achievable. The problem was that I didn't need to check the monthly overview enough to remind myself of those goals and so I didn't achieve any of them to the degree that I wanted.

The next page was my favourite and I will absolutely continue it throughout the year. It's a habit tracker. I wrote out things that I wanted or needed to do every day and then I coloured in the corresponding box if I completed it. It was a good way for me to see what I was doing well and what I struggled with. (Ignore the blank spaces in the middle of the month. I got really ill for a couple of weeks)

From there, I didn't want to overcomplicate it so I simply created weekly spreads, only drawing out one week at a time. This worked for me because I have a much more relaxed schedule at present and most of the things I have to complete each day are personal and so this journal was really just for me, not for tracking appointments and meetings. Again, I customised it to what was important for me. I kept one half of each day for recording my food intake and also whether or not I prayed that day. I wasn't too strict with whether I completed tasks on time as this was just a trial run for me but in the new year I definitely will follow through a bit more.

The final page of my December trial was a brain dump page as I didn't have much on since it was the holidays and I didn't need to follow a strict weekly plan so I just wrote down anything that felt relevant or that had happened during the day. I think I'm definitely going to keep a few pages free each month for this purpose of just dumping my brain on paper. 

Like I said, I kept it simple so as not to overwhelm myself. I've added an end of year review page, that I will fill out now, as the year is ended. And then I've drawn out a 2017 quote page and created a goals for 2017 page. It's not really a resolution page as I want the goals to be achievable and attainable. I'm going to keep the rest of it up as I have done in this month. I might add some more pages to track specific things and if I do, I might write another quick post about my new year changes.

But for now, this post has already gotten too long and for that, I apologise! For something that's supposed to streamline your life, I sure have rambled far too much. I hope this motivates some of you to maybe give this method a try and if you do, or if you already keep a bullet journal and have any tips, let me know.

Until next time, be inspired...

Love, Z 

Letter #34 - Make sure it brings you joy

To anyone who has ever questioned it,

In keeping my word about regular self care posts on a Sunday, I was going to write about skin care in the winter, because to me it always feeling like a bit of a pamper session. I've had a lot of people compliment, or rather question, the condition of my skin recently; what magic potion I must be using to keep it so clear. The thing is, I love my skin in the winter as it always seems to thrive before turning into a patchy mess come spring. But the irony of life stepped in just as I woke up intent on taking posts for the blog, with spots scattered across my chin and my cheeks. Now, I doubt that that's a sight anyone needs to see so I've had to talk about something else.

This is something I've noticed for a while and with the start of December, comes vlogmas for some YouTubers and that has made the issue more prominent in my eyes. Like anyone, I have my favourite social media 'influencers' and on watching recent videos or following their Snapchat and Instagram stories, the same words pop up all the time. These are words that always sounded strange but I presume that they come from a place of concern since their jobs are to portray their lives in a certain way. 

The words tend to fall along the lines of "sorry I look a mess", "I know I don't look great just yet" or "excuse my face" and they are soon followed by a reason as to why they haven't got makeup on. I hear it time and time again, and I feel sad for them. I can understand that they make a career out of beauty products and how to style their look and their makeup but surely they can be excused their appearance at the moment of waking or working in an empty home or simply living their lives.

The prominence of these words almost seems unfair on them. The Christmas season can be busy for the best of us and especially so for them, given that they have their own schedules to work to and events to attend AND they film it for the entertainment of others. But we shouldn't forget that they are filming a lot of their personal lives, and I think that that takes a certain level of courage and it's fantastic of them to do so. The level of public knowledge of their lives is different to that of celebrities in the traditional sense, since they are willingly letting the public into their lives and that is something you have to admire, whatever your view on them. 

But the sheer number of women who apologised to the camera for being flustered, or busy or especially, when they didn't have makeup on, and looked "a mess" was one too many. It sparked a thought and so that's why I'm writing this. 

Firstly, it isn't right for anyone to have to apologise for being a human being with a face that comes naturally unpainted. I needed to address that because it needs addressing and I'm sure it is something that people need to read about and have a think on. I find it interesting, for lack of a better word, that we are in an age and time where we have such education and understanding and yet we can still hold others to a certain standard when it is none of our concern. 

Those women may have apologised but when I read the comments sections, I understood why they felt the need to. So many comments pointed out their flaws or how different or tired they looked, and if this is constantly the feedback that they are exposed to, of course they will feel as though they have to be sorry for it. What I found most interesting was that most comments weren't by internet trolls, they were by fans or followers who had always been there. I don't think that their intentions are harsh, but it's what we have now become so accustomed to, that we feel the need to comment when it is no longer there.

Of course I'm talking about makeup here, but really any sort of imagined standard of appearance that is put on others is not okay. Something that started off as a bit of fun for most women has either become an obsession or a chore. I'm sure I sound so utterly against the idea of makeup but I love the stuff and I'm so fascinated and in awe of those who can apply it well and look so stunning with it. My only issue is that I generally think people look just as stunning without it.

I'm writing so much about other people and their presumed association with the stuff, I may as well explain my own view of it. In all honesty I don't have one. 

I'm just grateful that I don't feel a hold over my confidence from it. I'm grateful that as a young child, my mother never told me that I wasn't allowed to use it or that I was too young for it or anything along those lines. My dad once got me a huge makeup case when I was about 9 years old (he clearly didn't see anything wrong with it!) and it was one of those ones for young girls, with fluorescent pink blush and glitter lip glosses and the rest. I loved it and played dress up for about two weeks solid and then I got bored. I moved onto other interests after that. I never really thought about it until now, but I think the fact that I didn't have input from anyone else about if and when and how I should use it, meant that I formed my own opinion early on. I only ever saw it as a plaything. From then it couldn't define me because it held no interest for me. 

And now, at 22 years old, I do not wear makeup on a day to day basis and I love my complexion and all aspects of my face, because whenever I look in the mirror, I always see the same thing. I think that that is an important point in itself. There is absolutely nothing wrong with wearing makeup on an almost religious basis, as long as you don't forget that that reflection isn't the real deal.

I'm not saying that it's always been easy to love my skin. I certainly have days where I question whether I should resort to making it look more even or brighter or fresher or any number of things that can be done. It doesn't help that society is still wired a certain way.

When I lived with friends at uni, and when I would make new friends, they were always so curious as to why I didn't wear makeup. My idea of getting ready to go out with them meant taking a shower and putting on nicer clothes, whereas for them, it meant an hour in front of a mirror perfecting their faces. I also got roped into it exactly two times in those three years; times where I was begged to let them apply makeup on me and I relented as a bit of fun. But what I found was that it wasn't me. Nothing looked like me anymore. I'll add a photo somewhere here, but take my word for it, that's not what I look like even on my best day. And I don't need to.

My biggest problem was with the foundation. It covers all manner of sins but in the end, when you wipe it away, the imperfections are still there and I found myself disliking them. That day as I washed my face, I noticed the small freckles and the noticeable pores and it bothered me. The thing is I didn't like that it bothered me so the next time I got a request for being made up, I declined with a smile and reminded myself that I'm amazing as is.

In recent years, I think that there has been a move towards embracing ourselves in all aspects, with celebrities and others going out of their way to point out their no makeup selfies, but I think when something has been so ingrained for so long, it can be tough to wholeheartedly embrace it.

What I've noticed is that while it begins as fun, something to add a touch of colour, for the majority it eventually becomes a crutch. I've seen friends and relations alike terrified at the prospect of going about their daily lives without a full face of makeup. They refuse to be seen without it. They feel anxious at the thought and they feel as though it makes them unkempt.

I can understand the latter; I've had my fair share of remarks from well meaning individuals that seem to question how much I value myself. "You really don't like making an effort, do you?" or "surely you could have at least added some *insert product of choice*."

These statements and remarks shouldn't happen but it has become the case that if a women isn't made up, then on some level, she doesn't value herself enough or that she is lazy. I won't lie, I do get much more extra sleep compared to some of my friends but I spend my time taking care of my skin and my nutrition so that I have a good enough base that I can be content with.

This post has run far too long and if you've made it to the end, I commend you! I don't want this post to come across at all like I'm criticising those that wear makeup or promote it. I simply hope that people can be happy enough in their own skin that it becomes fun for them again. So it can be an addition to your face instead of a replacement.

Let me know what you think in the comments! 

Until next time, be inspired...

Love, Z

Letter #33 - Winter is coming

Dear all,

I'm so excited it's December! The minute the calendar flips, I always feel that little more cosy and safe. I know it's officially astronomically not winter yet, but for me, it is as soon as December arrives.

Winter is absolutely my favourite of all seasons and it's such a festive season at that. The fact that Christmas and New Years tie off the month make it all the more special.

Now I don't celebrate Christmas, but I love the idea. Yes, it may be commercial and more a holiday for marketing teams now but once in the swing of things, it creates such a nice atmosphere. The lights, the food, the indulgence and the chance to celebrate the year are all wrapped up in one. In essence, it's just all so pretty and I am basic enough to indulge in that and be proud of it.

This is the first year since I was about 12 that I've had a truly free holiday season. When you're in school, this was the time for term tests and extra holiday homework or as you get to university, it's the only time you have to study for exams which arrive with the new year. I am going to completely enjoy myself this month as I end the year.

So I thought I'd talk a bit about some of my favourite aspects of winter time is general. I know I'm not alone in my love for this time of year.

The air is beautiful

You know what I'm talking about. On the perfect mid winter's day, the skies will be clear and the air will feel crisp and fresh, and while you shiver, you'll also feel refreshed at the sensation. We've had a few of those days already this year, and as the weather gets even colder, I'm sure we'll have more. It makes a change to rain, and wind and even the humid summer months. I'm not at all a fan of summer, and spring and autumn tend to be too rainy for me. Winter is perfectly at peace.

The lights as they glow

In part because of how early darkness hits us, the lights can be a welcome reprieve as the sun takes its leave (that rhymed haha!). As soon as Halloween has come and gone, the Christmas preparations begin and fill the spaces of darkness with colourful and vibrant displays of light. I look forward to the annual switching on of the lights around town and the displays are beautiful. The absolute best place to witness beautiful displays and lights in my opinion is anywhere in London. There is always such a synchronicity between the store front displays and the street lights everywhere you turn. I think my love of lights and displays is similar to that of most people, but there's something about bright spots of colour dotted around an area that gives it an almost magical quality. It so perfectly complements the early darkness.

Darkness feeds my soul

As I just mentioned, it gets dark very early on in the day, usually around 4pm and alongside this, the sun is also late to rise. That is the part of the day that is my favourite. I'm an early riser most of the time, and by 6am, my eyes will open and I will have to debate whether to get up or to force myself to catch up with whatever dream I was consumed in. In the summer months, there is a busy atmosphere much earlier in the day as the sun usually peeks in through the curtains and people gladly begin their days. However, I hate that busy feeling and I much prefer solitude first time in the morning. I may be an early riser but that does not make me a "morning person". Frankly, I think of morning people as those who jump up with a smile on their face, eager to begin the day with a chat and some socialisation. I, however, much prefer a slow morning. That is the only way I can enjoy a morning properly.

I feel like I'm off on a tangent but basically, I like quiet and alone time when I wake and the winter grants that to me. I can get up at 6am, slowly become alert, and have a leisurely breakfast while other either sleep or get up with a grumble. Either way, they're not in the mood to bother me and I love that.

I also feel more productive like that, as thought I've beaten the sun to the finish line! See, I told you the darkness feeds my soul.

Excuse for sweet treats

There is a smell and a taste to winter and I think that might be my most favourite part of all. It's the season of warming soups, and hearty comfort meals; both of which I highly approve of indulging in. But it's also a time of celebration and as such, sweeties are called for. As someone who loves to bake, Christmas time is my go to for that. I become inspired and caught up in the smell of spices and fruit and it makes me more likely to bake. Cinnamon is the best smell to ever have in a kitchen and it's such a winter flavour that I can go a bit overboard with it.

As it's the season of giving, I can gift a lot of what I bake and that makes it all the more sweet when I do indulge in my treats for myself.

What inspires you in the winter and do you have a favourite month or season?

Until next time, be inspired...

Love, Z